Tobisuki, Tobi's Akatsuki!
by crimsonrose88
Summary: When Pein is severely wounded,the Akatsuki think that a replacement leader should be chosen...and the guy who gets the role as Akatsuki leader,is someone nobody in their right minds would choose. With him in charge,things will definitely be interesting!
1. New Leader!

**DISCLAIMER: I do not own Naruto. This story is purely fan-made!**

**Enjoy! )**

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Heavy footsteps walked through the dense forest, in a direct path to the hideout. The man staggered and nearly tripped on a tree root, catching himself just in time. He could feel his body slowly weakening; his muscles protesting with each step he took, and his brain threatening to engulf him in unconsciousness.

" _If only I could make it to the hideout…I'll be alright." _he thought numbly to himself. The bright moonlight glinted off his many piercings, and his orange-red hair was flung into his face by the soft breeze.

At last, he broke through the last vestiges of foliage and came upon the familiar sight. A tall cliff loomed high above the tree line at the far end of the clearing, and a small lake glittered in the moonlight, a few feet away. The clearing was remotely located, purposely far from the prying eyes of neighbouring villages. The Akatsuki hideout was located here, and was skilfully camouflaged within the cliff, so that it could be detected by no one outside the Akatsuki. Pein slowly walked towards the cliff, performed a few seals, and was admitted into a small opening which appeared as a slit in the cliff wall.

Once inside, he collapsed against a wall, and succumbed to unconsciousness.

………………………………...

Konan walked through the halls, book in hand. _"It seems as if those boys take up the entire hideout! Seriously, the only place I have peace and quiet is in my own room." _She had travelled to a nearby village yesterday, and bought a few books to read during those uneventful times at the hideout. But currently she was finding it impossible to read them, because there was always something happening with the other members, which distracted her.

Smartly, she proceeded to Zetsu's garden, the one serene and tranquil place in all the hideout-if you didn't get close to his carnivorous plants, that is. She took a detour around a few rooms and walked towards the main entrance of the hideout, planning to go to the gardens from there. Konan immediately noticed a man's figure laying sprawled along the wall of the main entrance, and screamed as she recognized the profile.

Her scream attracted the other members, who ran to see what was going on. They froze when they saw their fallen leader. Konan dropped to her knees and pulled Pein's figure in a sitting position. She checked his pulse, and was relieved to find that he was still alive. She looked up at the others, pale faced.

"What happened to him? He was probably poisoned or severely drugged, or-" Konan said worriedly.

"If he has been poisoned, I think I can help." Sasori responded quietly.

Itachi looked thoughtful. "If he has been injured by an enemy ninja, they must be extremely powerful to take down Pein like that. Unless they're already dead, which I doubt, we seem to have a new enemy."

"Thanks, Itachi. Our leader is grievously injured, and you know just how to make us feel a little less worried, don't you?" Kisame responded sarcastically.

Kakuzu stepped in before Itachi could respond. "I think it would be best if Sasori took Pein to the infirmary room to treat him. The sooner Pein is healed, the better."

Sasori nodded and attached a few chakra strings to Pein's body, so that he could transport him easier.

"Wait." Zetsu stepped from the shadows, and looked at the unconsciousness figure of Pein. "With Pein unable to lead us, I think we should find a temporary leader, just until he gets well."

"Well, since I was his teammate, I'll take over until he's healed." Konan said decisively.

"Hold on just a moment! I think its up for grabs who our next leader is going to be." Hidan responded defiantly.

"Excuse me? I was closest to Pein, so I think I know how to run our organization a little better than a guy who locks himself up in his room cutting himself!" Konan stood face to face with Hidan, both of them angrily staring each other down.

"Oh yeah, I'm sure you were extremely close to Pein, after all, you do seem to spend an awful lot of time with him…" Hidan stated suggestively, with a smirk.

"Shut up!" Konan flushed angrily; Sasori and Itachi had to hold her back, so she wouldn't beat up Hidan in anger.

"Why don't we just have a spar or something? The winner will be our temporary leader." Kakuzu suggested hastily.

Konan leaned against the wall, glaring at Hidan. "That's such a guy thing to do…honestly." Konan rolled her eyes.

"Aw, its ok Konan, we'll go easy on you. You know, so you don't lose." Hidan smirked evilly, enjoying the implied message his taunt held.

Konan's anger flared again. She created a whole bunch of sharp paper origami, and threw them at Hidan.

Kakuzu banged his head against the wall repeatedly. "What are you doing?" asked Deidara, as though worried for his sanity.

"I suggested that to stop their fight, not start a more violent one." he replied. Deidara grinned and shrugged. "Its fun to watch Hidan getting beaten up!" he said happily.

Konan's paper designs were getting more vicious each time, and it was only when she sent out a barrage of sharp, paper thin needles, which could sink inched deep and cause tremendous pain, that Sasori put chakra strings on both Konan and Hidan to stop their fighting.

"Why don't we just draw a paper to see who will be 'leader'? Itachi made a mark on one paper. There's one for each of us. Whoever gets the paper with a mark, will be our temporary leader." Kisame said, holding out a small bag. Each person drew a paper.

"There's one left. Who didn't draw?" Deidara asked. Kakuzu looked around the group. "Tobi."

Deidara rolled his eyes and called Tobi. "Yes, Sempai?" Tobi asked cutely hurrying towards him. "Just take the paper from the bag Tobi." Deidara muttered. "Ok!" Tobi pulled out the last paper, and opened it. "Ooh! There's a circle on my paper! What does that mean Sempai? Hmm?" Tobi looked up curiously at Deidara, who looked shocked. As did everyone else.

"What does the circle mean?" Tobi repeated. "It means that you're our new temporary leader…Tobi." Kakuzu replied. Tobi's face lit up, and a wide smile filled his face (underneath his mask). "Really? Wow! Tobi's gonna be a leader! You must be proud Sempai! Tobi knows lots of fun stuff we are going to do together! Yay!" Tobi bounced off to his room, eagerly planning his strange variety of activities and games and whatever else he thought of.

"Suddenly, I just had a vivid mental image of us playing 'Duck, Duck, Goose." Hidan stated hollowly.

Itachi shuddered. He knew that whatever Tobi planned on doing, it was going to ruin his sophisticated, cool guy reputation.

"I-I'll take Pein to the infirmary room." Sasori walked away, carrying Pein alongside him with chakra strings.

Deidara was banging his head on the wall. "Oh, come on Deidara. I'm sure its not going to be that bad, I mean, what's the worse that can happen? Sure, we may be mentally scarred for life, or lose 60 percent of our evilness, but we'll make it alive right?" Kakuzu said comfortingly. "_Wow, Tobi may be childish, but he sure is evil."_ Kakuzu thought as he realized the negativity of his words._"_

Konan laughed. "And what's so funny?" Hidan demanded, eyes narrowed. "Oh, nothing," she replied aloofly, "Its just that you big macho guys look really scared, and because of Tobi!" Still laughing, she walked away to her room before anyone could contradict her. Kisame yawned and declared that he was going to bed. Slowly, the other members began to drift to their rooms as well.

………………………………...

Itachi stood in the corner of his room too anxious to sleep. He prided himself on being the hot, cool, sophisticated, hot, elegant, dark, mysterious hot and powerful guy of the Akatsuki, and he knew that 2 minutes with Tobi would completely ruin his image and reputation, let alone a few days-maybe more. Kisame was already asleep across the room, and seemed pretty much untroubled; but then again, he didn't really have much of an image or reputation to maintain. "_Pein, you had best get better soon, or else you'll find your entire organization taken over by Tobi-imitations." _Itachi sighed in resignation and went to his bed. Unfortunately, his dreams were plagued with imagining the worst that Tobi could do; he shuddered in his sleep and vowed that he was going to take an extra long mission the next day.

………………………………...

Deidara walked to his bed, said good night to Sasori who was working on his puppets, and lay down, closing his eyes. "_Konan thinks we're fools for being apprehensive of having Tobi as a temporary leader? Clearly she hasn't spent too much time around him. We'll see what she thinks of Tobi when he starts to take over as leader, but it definitely will be interesting to see what he comes up with." _Deidara thought, as he fell asleep.

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Hope you liked the prologue, lots of hints for what's to come! Reviews/comments are always welcome!

-crimsonrose88 )


	2. No Way Out

**DISCLAIMER: This story is completely fan-made!**

**Enjoy!!**

**CHAPTER 2: No Way Out**

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The sun had barely risen in the sky, but there was already activity in the Akatsuki hideout.

Itachi woke at 5 am, and walked out of his room, careful not to wake Kisame, who was snoring quite contentedly; completely unaware of anything. Itachi slipped into the kitchen, hoping to eat a quick meal before he left-for how long he wasn't sure. But there was already someone there.

"Sasori?" Itachi asked, eyebrow raised. Sasori looked up, his mouth half full of tea. He swallowed and gave Itachi a look that said "_You know what I'm doing here." _Itachi opened the fridge and took out some food and juice.

"I refuse to be the victim of Tobi's madness. I have an image to keep, and besides, I doubt any sane person would actually want to do whatever Tobi's planning. I had a long and horrible night thinking about what Tobi could do to us." Itachi said flatly. Sasori nodded in agreement. "Sometimes I wonder why he's in the Akatsuki in the first place. He's practically the total opposite of what people think of when they hear the work 'Akatsuki'. The corner of Itachi's mouth twitched into what could have been interpreted as a half smile.

They both ate in silence, too absorbed in their own thoughts to communicate much with each other. After they had finished and cleared up, Itachi glanced at the clock. "Its almost 5:30. We'd better leave now if we don't want to get caught." Sasori nodded and they both quietly crept to the main entrance of the hideout. Sasori performed the necessary hand seals to open the door…but nothing happened. Itachi raised an eyebrow. Sasori looked faintly puzzled, and tried again. The door remained closed. "Is it stuck or something?" They both had question marks over their heads as they peered at the door.

Itachi reached out to give it a push, and it clicked something which started to make a horrible sound. A loud, wailing screechy sound echoed loudly throughout the hideout; Itachi's touch seemed to have triggered something. They both stood startled in front of the door for a few minutes, trying to block out the loud sound.

"WHAT THE CRAP IS THAT AWFUL SOUND?" Hidan had obviously woken up, and was swearing like crazy on the top of his voice, while Kakuzu tried to calm him down. They walked from their room and down the hall, spotting Itachi and Sasori. "What's that sound?" Kakuzu asked loudly, trying to make himself heard. Sasori and Itachi shrugged. A few seconds later, Kisame walked to the group, rubbing the sleep from his eyes. "Why's Tobi singing so early in the morning?" Kisame mumbled with a yawn.

"That's not me Kisame-san! That's the alarm system I attached to the door. When I'm leader, I want everyone to have fun, so I blocked the door, so no one could leave." Tobi exclaimed cheerfully. Tobi deactivated the system, and at once the noise stopped. Everyone's ears were ringing from the quiet silence, since they could still hear echoes of the wailing. However, once they heard that Tobi had blocked the only way out of the hideout, one universal thought seemed to go through everyone's head. _"DAMN!" _

"Now, since everyone's here-wait! Where's Konan, Zetsu and Deidara-sempai?" Hmm…since Sasori and Itachi were bad boys and tried to leave, they have to wake everyone up!" Tobi said. He flounced away, and the rest of the group followed him, grinning at Itachi and Sasori's misfortune. "Good luck!" Kisame called, laughing silently. Sasori and Itachi looked at each other. it was going to be impossible to wake up Konan; she never let anyone in her room. Deidara…well he was a really deep sleeper, and not one to be woken up in the early morning hours. As for Zetsu, well, they might as well be writing their final goodbye's now; if his dark side woke up first, they'd probably be venus flytrap-ed to the Akatsuki cloud in the sky… or be eaten by a carnivorous plant; which ever was easier for him. They both sighed audibly and decided to wake up Deidara first.

" Be careful, Itachi. He has an annoying habit of leaving his explosives lying around." Sasori warned. They walked up to the room Sasori and Deidara shared, and opened the door softly. Deidara was lying on the bed, deep in sleep while snoring lightly. "Um…Deidara…wake up?" Itachi shook Deidara's shoulder hesitatingly, then started poking him repeatedly on the arm, trying to get him to wake up. Deidara frowned in his sleep, and unconsciously picked up one of his explosives. He threw it at Itachi, with a mumbled "Katsu." Itachi was taken by surprise, and the explosive exploded on contact with his face. "What the hell?" Itachi coughed and stumbled back, waving away the explosive smoke. There was a large red mark on the side of his face, where the explosive had hit him; Sasori looked amused, but tried to stifle a smirk, which Itachi saw anyways with narrowed eyes. "You shouldn't wake him like that, or he will unconsciously throw something at you." Itachi looked coldly at Sasori, and asked why he hadn't been given the Deidara-safety lesson before. "_Oh man…this is shaping up to be the best day ever. I've only been awake for 2 hours and I've already gone deaf and had half my face blown up." _Itachi reflected.

Sasori stood a safe distance from Deidara, and moved his fingers lazily. Thin chakra strings attached to Deidara's body and moved his arms and legs, to motivate him to get up himself. Deidara didn't throw anything but he didn't get up either. "Excellent Sasori. You truly are a master at waking people up." Itachi commented sarcastically, leaning on the wall. "Oh, shut up. At least I didn't get partially exploded." Itachi's mocking look faded, and he became haughty once again. Sasori smirked and was hit with an idea. He used his chakra strings to make Deidara pick up his own clay, then made him hold it in front of his face. Sasori whispered 'Katsu!" The clay bird exploded and Deidara woke with a start. 'WHAT THE HELL?" Deidara shouted, confusedly pulling himself out of his tangle of blankets. He shouted a few more swear words, obviously learned from Hidan, then frowned as his gaze rested on the two guys. "Sorry, but we were asked to wake you. Orders from our new 'leader'." Sasori said.

They both walked out of the room and Itachi nodded appreciatively in Sasori's direction; now Deidara would have a mark on his face too.

Deidara groaned as he remembered that Tobi was now the new temporary leader, and flopped back into his bed. It wasn't worth it to get up."

"One down, two more to go." Sasori stated quietly. Itachi nodded. "Who's next? Zetsu or Konan?" Sasori thought for a bit. "I think we should try Zetsu first. He's a morning person, right?" Itachi gave Sasori a "_You must be kidding me" _look, but agreed. They walked to the opposite end of the base and walked to Zetsu's room. He liked his solitude, so his room was isolated, but near his indoor garden. Itachi knocked and waited for a response. After a few minutes, Sasori concluded that he was probably still asleep, so he cautiously opened the door and they both stepped inside.

His room was extremely dark, and had a plant-like aroma wafting around. As their eyes adjusted, Sasori saw a huge plant creeping its vines around his and Itachi's legs. He tried to jump back, but the vines were incredibly strong. Itachi held a kunai and tried to sever the vines with it, but they were too strong, and the kunai merely glanced off its membrane. A few minutes later, they were hopelessly tangled and the plant started to tighten its grip on the two guys, slowly reeling them in. Itachi mumbled a few inaudible words to himself; Sasori looked at him strangely, and wondered what he was doing. "Are you praying or something?" He asked curiously. Itachi gave him a flat stare. "Do I look like Hidan to you? I was just asking myself what I had done to deserve my life being ended by a carnivorous plant."

A voice chuckled in the darkness. "Itachi…you always were dramatic." Zetsu appeared from the darkness and called off the plant. Its vines released its grip and recoiled back to the plant. "You were awake the whole time?" Sasori asked disbelievingly. "Yeah, we woke up when we heard that ugly sounding alarm or whatever it was. I also heard you knock, but thought that it would be a good opportunity for Delila to get some exercise." Zetsu said, nodding towards the plant. Itachi looked at the plant. "_Wow…that's the farthest thing from a 'Delila' I've ever seen. It should definitely be renamed something ugly and horrible and vicious, like…Hidan- junior or something_." Judging by the look on Sasori's face, he was thinking the same thing--well, minus the Hidan junior comment. When Zetsu left, they closed the door on the plant and walked towards Konan's room. The last person they had to wake up.

They made their way to another isolated section of the hideout, where Pein and Konan's rooms were located. They stopped in front of a door decorated with origami figures, spelling out the word 'KONAN'. They decided to forego knocking, because they knew that she would probably not be awake. They both looked in astonishment at the interior of the room. They had never actually seen the inside of Konan's room, but they assumed that it would be simple, with a few personalized touches, like their own rooms. How very wrong they were. "_Holy crap…she has a sofa set, T.V, adjoining bathroom suite, deluxe canopy bed, and a mini-kitchen? Wow…favouritism much_?" Sasori thought. "_Hn…Pein's room is probably the same, if not better. So he gives himself and Konan the best rooms, and leaves us with the crappy ones_?" Itachi thought sardonically. They made their way to Konan's bedroom area, which was just hidden by view by long intricate paper origami chains (walking on extremely soft and expensive carpeting, by the way).

Sasori raised an eyebrow and gestured in Konan's direction. Itachi shook his head. He was NOT going to be the one to wake her up. It seemed like everyone had some kind of anti-wake-up-call thing in their rooms, and he didn't want to have anymore injuries on his part. Sasori rolled his eyes, and walked up to Konan's sleeping form.

"Konan? Konan, please wake up." He murmured softly. She didn't move. Sasori was really hesitant, because he didn't want to do something that would make her extremely angry at him later. He glanced at Itachi for help, but Itachi was already half-way to the door. _"Great…what an idiot. And he's supposed to be the tough guy of the Akatsuki. But then again…when Konan's angry, she's even scarier than Tobi when he's had too much hyperness-inducing food _(_a.k.a everything he eats, apparently_)." Sasori sighed and walked away. She'd have to wake up eventually right? And he wasn't the type of person to die trying. Unfortunately, his cloak got stuck on one of the corners of her dressing table. He jerked it free, but knocked over some of the stuff in the process. It made a really loud crash, and Sasori winced as he noticed that Konan had woken up.

"Sasori? What are you-" Konan blinked and fell silent as her gaze rested on the jumble of items on her table that Sasori had knocked over. "SASORI!? YOU ARE SUCH A CLUMSY FOOL! THAT GLASS HEART WITH THE PAPER CRANE IN IT WAS A GIFT FROM PEIN! IF THERE IS EVEN A SINGLE SCRATCH ON IT, YOU WILL BE VERY SORRY INDEED!!" She shouted. Sasori paled, and ran as fast as he could out of the room, dodging the various paper missiles she was throwing at him behind his back. _"Damn…that woman is SCARY." _He dashed out the door, nearly avoiding being impaled with a paper thin needle. Itachi glanced at him curiously, but Sasori just gave him a dark look, and walked on. They arrived at the living room a few minutes later, and collapsed on the nearest couch.

"Well well. They're alive!" Hidan remarked sardonically. The two boys gave him a glare, and let their heads fall back onto the sofa. A few minutes later, Konan appeared, and sat opposite Sasori, who realized that he had gotten off easy. If he had broken her precious gift from Pein… Everyone looked at Tobi half-interestedly as he stood up, and looked through some papers he was holding.

"OK! Now that we're all here, let the fun begin!" He looked so enthusiastic, that the rest of the group sweat-dropped. _"Damn…anything that makes Tobi that happy, can't be good for us." _they all thought.

………………………………...

Well, now that everyone is FINALLY awake and has realized that there is no way out, Tobi's gonna bring out his brand of fun! It will be survival of the fittest-or not, as Tobi completely degrades the 'Akatsuki' name... can you seriously picture the Akatsuki as little Tobi's? Just a thought…which is pretty funny to imagine actually! So next chapter will be the start of the Akatsuki's new leadership...which will be completely Tobi-fied! Reviews and comments are always welcome!

-crimsonrose88


	3. On The Move

**DISCLAIMER: I do not own Naruto…this fic is purely fan-made!**

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**Chapter 3: On the Move**

"OK! Now, let's begin!" Tobi stood on the centre table, and his voice practically radiated his excitement. "To make me seem like a real leader, I thought we should have missions. So I've created a list with new partners for everyone, and the missions I want done. It took me the whole night to come up with all this, so do as I say!"

Kakuzu tried to hide a laugh. "_Looks like Tobi stayed up all night to work on his 'Pein' impression as well."_

Tobi jumped off the table, with a swish of his cloak and disappeared through the door, sticking the papers on a wall as he did so.

"Oi, Kakuzu, read off those papers would you?" asked Deidara, who was stretched lazily on the couch. "…right…" Kakuzu rolled his eyes, but got up and detached the papers from the wall. "Ok…the new teams are Konan with Kisame, Zetsu with Itachi, Sasori with me, and Hidan with Deidara."

Everyone nodded to their new partner, except for Deidara, whose eye twitched as he glanced nervously at Hidan's scythe and creepy grin. "_Why? Why do I have to be the one stuck with the creepy Jashinist? Just kill me now…or Hidan will do it." _Deidara was freaked out, but tried not to let it show.

"_Am I really that bad? Deidara looks pretty scared…hehe I'm gonna have fun tormenting him, what with all my 12 rituals per day…" _Hidan thought, looking at Deidara with an evil smile.

Kakuzu flipped the paper, and read the other side, which contained details about their missions. "Missions. Ok, so we have to each…what the hell? I'm not doing this." Kakuzu dropped the paper, and sat back down. "What?" asked Itachi. Sasori sighed picked up the paper with his chakra strings. "Missions. Gather information on the 4 rookie groups of Konoha, led by Kakashi, Kurenai, Asuma and Gai."

"No way. I'm not going to waste my time to gather information on some weak pathetic genins. What does this have to do with us anyways?" Hidan muttered.

"Nothing really, but it's a leader-assigned mission. So we have no choice but to accept." Itachi said grudgingly.

"You know what? I'm gonna go and tell the 'leader' what I think of his 'missions'" Hidan grabbed his scythe and headed for the door, with a dark expression on his face.

Konan had been listening quietly, but knew that Itachi was right anyways. Having Hidan beat up Tobi was not going to help matters. _"But…Hidan's too stubborn and violent to listen to reason, unless…" _Konan grinned. "Hey, Hidan, if you don't want to do the mission, I'll ask Tobi if one of us can cover for you. I mean, it may be dangerous for you to gather information on a bunch of genins, since they are so strong and all. You don't have to hide your fear of rookies from us."

"_Ohh, she is good. A mix of sarcastic attitude and taunting will definitely ensure that he will complete the mission. But I do think that last line was a bit too much." _Kakuzu thought.

Hidan stopped, and turned his head slowly, eyes narrowed in a glare. _"WHAAAT?? Fear of rookies? Who the hell does she think I am? Fear of rookies… I'll show her a fear of rookies…but she'd better learn to fear my scythe!" _

"You know what Konan? I'll do the mission. And I'll do it better and faster than you and shark-face over there!" He stormed out of the room, and Deidara looked at the ceiling and sighed. "_Geez…it would have been scary enough for me to deal with him when he was in a normal mood, but now he's super mad…" _Deidara thought. "_This 'mission' is going to be so troublesome_."

Kisame sweat dropped. _"Geez, I've never seen him so motivated to do a mission that didn't involve assassinations. And its one of Tobi's missions no less…Wait. Did he just call me shark-face?" _

"_Score! Hidan's so predictable." _Konan smirked, but faltered as she saw the look on Deidara's face. "_Hehe…oops! Sorry Deidara, but he's now your problem." _

"Who's going to do which group?" asked Zetsu quietly from the shadows he always seems to be conveniently located in. He wasn't the type to joke around much, so he just wanted the missions to be finalized.

"I want to take Kakashi's group." said Itachi.

"I really don't care, but I guess I'll take Asuma's?" said Deidara.

"We'll take Gai's." Kisame said.

"Guess that leaves us with Kurenai's, then." said Kakuzu with a look at Sasori. He nodded in response.

"We should prepare ourselves and get ready to leave soon. It will take us at least 1 day to reach Konoha, so the faster we leave, the better." Itachi stated logically.

Everyone nodded, and began to drift to their rooms in order to gather all their necessary equipment.

"Hey, Kakuzu? Do you think you could tell Hidan that we're scouting Asuma's group? And also tell him to meet at the front in about half an hour." Deidara muttered.

"Sure thing, Deidara. I'll also try to calm him down for you shall I? And give him some soothing tea, for you. Oh, and steal his scythe too. Anything else?" "Damn!…I'm not scared of him Kakuzu! So stop acting like that!" Deidara left the room and Kakuzu grinned. _'Riight…sure you're not. But then again, you're not 'immortal' so you have a right to be scared." _

………………………………...

Kakuzu walked to the room he and Hidan shared, and nodded at Hidan's body on the floor, which was pierced with sharp objects and severed in some places. "Kakuzu…how many…times have I told you…not to walk in here…when I'm doing a ritual?" Hidan's voice was constricted with pain and pleasure, and he glared at Kakuzu. Kakuzu merely turned his back on him. "Sorry. Are you going to continue your rituals when you're on the mission as well though? Because I think you've completely scared Deidara."

"Of course. I can't deny Jashin just because I'm inconveniencing my new partner. If it doesn't bother you, then it shouldn't bother him either. And as long as he doesn't anger me, he won't force me to do unnecessary rituals as well. Thank Jashin I'm not stuck with Konan. If I was, I'd probably have to do rituals every 5 minutes to control myself." Hidan whispered hoarsely.

"Huh. You and Deidara are scouting Asuma's group, and Deidara wants you to meet him at the front in about half an hour." Kakuzu said, while packing what he needed for the mission.

"Yeah, ok." Hidan started pulling the daggers, kunai and knives from his body, grimacing each time the objects parted with his flesh.

………………………………...

Itachi and Kisame were in their room, preparing for their missions. They both lightly packed, since there wasn't really anything that they needed. Kisame was fawning over Samehada, and Itachi was checking his weapon stores.

"Hey, Itachi? Why did you want Kakashi's group? Is it because of Sasuke?" Kisame asked looking up.

Itachi paused, and spoke to his hands, instead of looking at Kisame. "I guess. Its been many years since I've last seen him…and I'm curious to see how he's grown."

Kisame knew that this was a touchy subject with Itachi, so he let it go, and didn't question him any further.

………………………………...

Konan was packed and ready, all she needed was for Kisame to come, so that they could leave.

"_Maybe…I should see how Pein's doing, before I go." _She thought, cheeks tinting slightly.

She walked to the corridor leading to his room, since surprisingly, they didn't have an infirmary. He was lying on his large bed, still unconscious, but looking better than he had when she had first found him.

Konan smiled gently. "_He looks much better now. I hope he will feel better soon, because I--we really, really need him back." _She looked down at his face, half hidden with strands of his fiery hair. _"Its just not the same without you, Pein." _She pushed back his hair, and then turned to leave.

She reached the main entrance a few minutes later, and saw that everyone had already assembled.

"Alright! Now that you're all here, its time for you to go on your missions! Good luck to you all…you may need it." Tobi stood off to the side, and performed the required seals to open the door. The Akatsuki members left, some nodding to Tobi on their way out.

"_Geez, he's acting as if he's sending us on an A-rank mission, instead of an E-rank mission." _thought Deidara, as he walked past him.

Once they were all out, the door closed abruptly, and they were left facing a blank looking cliff wall.

"Alright, lets go."

The four teams split up, and started on different paths, though all leading to their final destination: Konoha.

………………………………...

Now, that all the teams are on the move, its gonna be another day before they reach Konoha…and they have all this time to get to know their new partners a little better…for the better or worse. In case you were wondering, there is obviously no such thing as an E-rank mission but Deidara's just emphasizing the fact that he thinks that Tobi's mission is not even worth being a D-rank…although I'm sure you already figured that out . the next few chapters are going to be individuals, as we see what happens to the Akatsuki teams as they travel to Konoha! Reviews and comments are always welcome!

-crimsonrose88


	4. Kisame & Konan

**DISCLAIMER: **Pretty much self-explanatory right? But anyways, I don't own Naruto and this is a purely fan-made fan fic

Chapter 4: Konan and Kisame

It had been 9 hours since Kisame and Konan had left the Akatsuki base. They didn't really talk to each other much, but they still were able to waste many of the long hours making fun of the other members and discussing various flop missions they and the others had gone on.

"Kisame, let's stop now." Konan swung gracefully from the last tree branch, and landed softly on the ground. Kisame followed her lead and jumped down as well, though landing slightly more heavily.

"We'll reach the first major village soon, so I think it would be wise for us to change our appearances, so that no one will recognize us." Konan closed her eyes and performed a few hand signs. In a puff of smoke, she had transformed herself into a pretty black haired kunoichi; completely unrecognizable, but she kept the small flower in her hair. She checked out her appearance in the water, and smiled in satisfaction. She turned back to Kisame, who had also transformed, and sweat dropped.

"Um...Kisame, the whole point of transforming ourselves is so that we won't be recognized."

Kisame looked confused. "Of course! I've changed my appearance completely! See?"

"Yeah…but you still have blue skin. And that makes you too obvious."

"Why?"

"Because you're the only person in the world I know of who has blue skin! Now change it!"

"But…it looks cool…" Kisame responded meekly.

"CHANGE IT RIGHT NOW OR I WILL DO IT FOR YOU!" Konan shouted. "_Geez, why is he being so stubborn?"_

"But…" Konan's hands started to perform the seals, so Kisame hastily changed his skin colour to one more natural.

"Good. Now for Samehada."

Kisame raised an eyebrow. "What? What about Samehada?"

"Kisame…just like your skin, you're the only person in the world with that kind of sword! If you walked into Konoha like that, they'd recognize you right away, no matter how--good-- your disguise is." Konan explained.

"Why are you being so discriminatory towards me? I happen to like my blue skin, and Samehada's the best weapon." He said proudly. However, he realized the truth in her words. Kisame took Samehada from his back and laid it on the ground. He started to perform the seals, then changed his mind. A few seconds later, he performed the seals again, only to stop.

Konan was twitching in impatience. "What the heck are you doing? Just change it into a kunai or something and let's go!"

"Samehada's really special. I can't just change it into something as ordinary as a kunai. It has to be a weapon which is elegant, and awesome, and deadly like Samehada." He stood for another five minutes, with a look of intense concentration on his face, as he tried to think of a suitable weapon which would be worthy of Samehada.

Konan just looked at him, and sighed. "_Oh my gosh. Why does he have to go all Samehada-pride on me? If we don't make it at least half-way to Konoha by night fall, we're not going to reach there on time. And even if this is a stupid mission, I don't think I could face Hidan if he managed to return back to the hideout first." _

Ten minutes later, Kisame had settled on transforming Samehada into a katana, but he gave a whispered apology for transforming Samehada into something less than its usual awesomeness.

"_Wow…I never knew Kisame was so attached to that sword…its almost creepy." _Konan thought in amusement.

They reached the village a short time later, and were surprised to find it less crowded than usual. This was the village where they usually bought supplies and the other things necessary for the Akatsuki base, so they were familiar with it. They looked at random shops and vendors as they walked by, and even managed to discreetly sneak food from a couple of unobservant sellers, to eat later.

"Its starting to get dark, Konan." Kisame said, glancing at the sky. Konan nodded, and they both picked up their pace, so that they left the village far behind them. They passed by a few smaller villages, but didn't even bother to stop. A couple hours later, they started feeling the exhaustion that comes with 12 hours of continuous travel, so they decided to stop and set up their sleeping bags.

"We're about four hours from Konoha." Konan commented.

"Yeah. Looks like we were a little ahead of schedule, but you know what? Its actually more efficient to travel with you. I mean, every time Itachi and I have to go to Konoha, he makes us stop at all the dango shops along the way, so it takes us like 3 hours longer. Seriously… an S-rank criminal with a dango obsession" Kisame shook his head in amusement.

"_Seriously, an S-rank criminal with a skin-colour obsession."_ Konan laughed lightly, and took out the food she had taken from the vendor. Kisame did the same, and they ate in silence.

After they finished, the two lay down on their sleeping bags, and stared up at the sky, which was lit by thousands of stars. The wind blew lazily on their faces, giving the environment a peaceful feel. Konan sighed contentedly and closed her eyes. Opposite her, Kisame had already started to fall asleep.

"_I wonder if Pein will get better when we return?…But I also wonder what's gonna happen to Tobi, when he does. I doubt the others are going to let him be, especially if he thinks up any more useless craziness." _Konan smiled, and shifted into a more comfortable position. It really was nice to be outdoors, with the beautiful night sky, the calming breeze, the insects which created a chorus of calming night sounds, and--

"_GIGANTIC MONSTROUS SNORE"_

Konan opened her eyes, startled. She looked around, and found the noise to be coming from Kisame.

"_Great…He snores…so LOUD!." _Konan sighed deeply and turned her head, snuggling deeper into the sleeping bag and trying to block out his sound. It wasn't working. She sighed again. This was going to be a very long and irritating night.

"………_..Poor Itachi…" _

………………………………...

The next morning, Kisame was the first to wake up, and so he began packing up. Konan woke a few minutes later, yawning and looking very tired.

"Are you ok? You look tired." asked Kisame, turning at the sound of her movement.

"You snore. A lot. Very loudly." She replied darkly.

"Oh. Sorry about that…I didn't even notice." He smiled apologetically, and thankfully she let it go.

As Konan had predicted, they managed to reach Konoha in 4 hours. They stood at the main gates, and flashed some fake I.D's prepared beforehand, the pictures being altered to match their looks. The two guard ninja's let them through with a smile, and returned to their post. Konan and Kisame nodded to each other, and began to explore the village, looking for the team they were meant to gather information on.

………………………………...

-crimsonrose88


	5. Hidan & Deidara

**DISCLAIMER: I do not own Naruto, this fic is purely fan-made **

**Chapter 5: Hidan and Deidara**

"Katsu!"

_BOOM!_

"Katsu!"

_BOOM!_

"Ka-"

"CAN YOU STOP DOING THAT?" Hidan and Deidara had been travelling for about 8 hours already, and to pass the time, Deidara had been making and exploding his clay sculptures. Hidan had tried to ignore it, but after the 21st time, his fingers were itching to take his scythe and cut off Deidara's hands.

"We need to stop now." Hidan muttered a few minutes later.

"Again? We just stopped an hour and a half ago." replied Deidara.

"Yeah? Well I need to do another ritual."

Deidara rolled his eyes. "Can we at least stop at a village or something first? I'm hungry."

"Jashin wants a ritual now, so I'm damn well going to give him a ritual NOW." Hidan said angrily. He formed his ritual circle, and took his place in the centre.

"Fine, but I'm going to the next village. I'll be back in an hour. You'll be done by then right?" Deidara asked.

"Don't think so. It's a two hour ritual this time." replied Hidan, as he started his preparations.

Deidara sighed. "_Two hours? No wonder Kakuzu-san always complains about him. Honestly, if we keep having to stop for these rituals of his, we're going to reach Konoha in about a week." _Deidara sighed impatiently, and made his way to the next village he knew was on the way.

As he was travelling, Deidara recalled the first ritual that he had been forced to witness, which had taken place an hour after they had left the base. He had been mentally scarred upon seeing Hidan's stab wounds and all the blood that accompanied it. Even though he turned away from Hidan after, he still heard Hidan's shouts and hisses as he continuously impaled himself for what seemed like hours. However, Deidara suspected that he was over-exaggerating his ritual just to freak him out…and it was unfortunately working. "_Stupid mental images…" _Deidara thought fervently.

Since that incident, every time Hidan needed to complete a ritual, Deidara had decided to save what was left of his innocent mind by travelling on ahead to a village or some place quiet to wait for Hidan to catch up.

He reached the village without incidence and his eyes lit up, upon seeing the multiple food stands, which gave off the delicious aromas of whatever was being prepared.

"_YUM!" _

………………………………...

Exactly 2 hours later, Deidara returned back to where Hidan was, a stick of half-eaten dango in his hand.

"Not done yet?" Deidara asked calmly, chewing the last piece of dango. He had finally mastered his self-control, and no longer felt repulsed when he looked at Hidan during his rituals.

Hidan paused in the midst of taking out one of the knives. "Deidara…you need to clean up the mess." Hidan muttered.

"Mess? What mess?…I am NOT cleaning your blood, thanks."

"Not my blood, idoit, that." Hidan's head gestured to the side, where two girls lay on the ground, apparently unconscious. They had unfortunately walked down the path Hidan was doing his ritual on, and at the sight of all his self-inflicted wounds, they had fainted.

"Aw, mentally scarred another innocent bystander? This is the fourth one so far, not including me."

"Not my fault you people are weak." Hidan shot back.

Deidara ignored this comment, but threw the stick from his dango at Hidan's head. Hidan glared and picked up one of his kunai, but Deidara was too quick for him. He picked up the two girls, and transported them and himself to the main road. He left them at the side of the road, where they could easily return back to the village when they woke up.

When he returned, Hidan had thankfully packed up all his weapons, and they continued wordlessly on their way to Konoha.

………………………………...

They had lost a lot of time due to Hidan, so when night began to fall, they were several hours behind schedule, and only half way to Konoha.

"Deidara-"

A vein pulsed on Deidara's forehead. "NO MORE RITUALS, HIDAN!"

Hidan made an impatient noise, which sounded vaguely like _Idoit_, but surprisingly relented.

Deidara watched as the night sky grew darker, and the breeze became chillier.

"Hidan, maybe we should stop now, and then continue again in the morning." Deidara stated after a few minutes.

"Are you serious? We're not even three quarters of the way there!" Hidan replied.

"I wonder why that is…HIDAN?" Deidara said, looking pointedly at him.

"…Fine."

They both searched for a secluded area, where they could sleep, without being noticed. Deidara pointed out a small glade-like area, and they both made their way there. Deidara set up his sleeping bag, and was about to go to sleep, when he noticed Hidan drawing a ritual circle.

"Hidan…"

"You made me miss that ritual 10 minutes ago. Since we're not gonna be travelling anymore tonight, I'm completing it now. Jashin hates it when I skip a ritual." Hidan explained.

"But I'm trying to sleep, un"

Hidan twitched. "I thought you forgot how to say that annoying word at the end of each sentence."

Deidara smirked and lay back down in his sleeping bag. "Sorry…un."

………………………………...

"OH MY JASHIN!" Hidan shouted, pulling himself unceremoniously out of his sleeping bag.

Deidara woke with a start, and glanced around sleepily. The sky was still dark, meaning that it wasn't even dawn yet.

"What's the matter now?" mumbled Deidara sleepily.

"I missed my 2 am ritual! Now I have to make up for it by doing another 2 hour ritual!" Hidan stated frantically. He quickly drew his ritual circle, apologizing profusely to his Jashin-sama for seeming like an undevoted Jashinist.

"_Oh, for the love of…you know what? I give up on him. As of now, I don't care anymore about him and his rituals. Let us just arrive at Konoha next week, see if I care." _Deidara thought frustrated.

Sleep was impossible once Hidan started his ritual, so Deidara packed up and continued on the way, pausing only to explode a couple of clay figures on Hidan to vent his feelings. Hidan glared at him with such a murderous look in his eyes, that Deidara decided the best thing would be for him to just go. Go far, far away.

………………………………...

A few hours later, Hidan caught up with Deidara, who tensed expecting him to attack or something. Surprisingly, Hidan just fell into step with Deidara, and travelled in silence.

"You're not going to kill me Hidan?" Deidara asked hesitatingly.

"No…Jashin said that would be a waste of time, but he did said I could hurt you non-fatally." whispered Hidan with an evil grin.

Deidara paled, and picked up his speed, but not without getting whacked by the blunt end of Hidan's scythe. He fell to the ground, knocked out, with little pictures of Hidan and his scythe floating around his head.

"…that's not what you meant Jashin-sama?" asked Hidan, apparently to thin air.

"_Oh well…he deserved it." _Hidan grinned, but picked up the unconscious Deidara, and carried him for the remaining 9 hours of their trip to Konoha. Fortunately for him, Deidara woke up 3 hours in, though he did give Hidan a dark look for the large bruise he had on the back of his head. _"Geez…this is the most painful trip I've ever taken…he's completely different from Sasori-danna."_ thought Deidara.

………………………………...

6 hours and 5 rituals later, Hidan and Deidara both managed to reach Konoha. Deidara created a small diversion using his explosives, and they both slipped in the gates without being noticed. They both changed out of their Akatsuki cloaks into something which blended in more, and changed their headbands to match Konoha's as well.

"Alright, lets go look for…Asuma, was it?" Deidara asked. Hidan nodded and they both walked through the streets of Konoha.

………………………………...

Hmm…Konoha has really bad security in this fic, don't they? And apparently, Hidan and Deidara aren't exactly the best team ever, but hey, they made it to Konoha…in less than a week, right? Next chapter, will be Zetsu and Itachi, so look out for it! Reviews and comments always welcome!

-crimsonrose88


	6. Itachi & Zetsu

**DISCLAIMER: **I don't own Naruto…this is a fan-made fanfic!

Chapter 6: Itachi and Zetsu

It was quiet. Very quiet. The two Akatsuki members moved noiselessly through the trees, not wasting any breath on idle chatter. They were known for their solitude, so by respecting each others silence they were able to get along quite well. Their trip had started off without any major setbacks, and they hoped to maintain that level of activity until they reached Konoha; with less than 6 hours to go they were making good time. That is, until Zetsu made a very major _honest_ mistake.

"Why'd you have to eat that sleeping ninja? I thought you only ate dead things." muttered Itachi as he glided through the trees with astonishing speed.

"**Shut up.** I didn't know that he was sleeping, and I was hungry! It was an honest mistake." responded Zetsu defensively. Itachi rolled his eyes. "_Yeah, I'm sure it was."_

The first 9 hours of their trip had melted away rapidly, and after a nights sleep, they felt confident that they could quietly make their way to Konoha. They had made their way to a small and isolated food shop, where Itachi went in to buy some food, and Zetsu made his way through the surrounding wilderness to find something suitable for him to eat. He'd wandered for a good 15 minutes with no luck. "_This might be the first forest I've been to where there are no animals or anything for me to eat. And near a food shop, I'd have thought there would be at least something. __**Unless whatever is being sold in the food shop is so repulsive even animals don't want to eat it.**__ Didn't Itachi go in there though?__** You're point? **__Oh." _Zetsu's stomach grumbled quietly, and he sighed and trudged off in hopes of finding something, and quickly_. _

By chance, he stumbled onto a campsite, which had been recently occupied judging by the small fire which was still smouldering slightly. _"No luck here…wait."_ He saw a young ninja who laid sprawled on the ground under a large leafy tree. He was motionless, and had his eyes closed. _"__**FOOD! **__At last, something edible…and a ninja too! Tasty…" _His hunger consumed his common sense, so he never considered that the ninja might not actually be dead, or that he was part of a group of Jounins.

A few minutes later, the landscape was cleansed of the body, and Zetsu made his way back, feeling satisfied. He had only taked a few steps, when 5 other ninjas jumped down into the clearing, staring in horror at the spot where their comrade once slept; shocked at the manner of his death. "We leave to get some food, and this is what we return to find?" one shouted angrily. The others wore similar looks of anger and narrowed their eyes in Zetsu's direction. "He was a good comrade to us, and for that, expect us to avenge him!" another shouted, taking out weapons with both hands and flinging them in Zetsu's direction.

As if that was a cue, the rest took out their own weapons and unleashed their attacks on the unfortunate Zetsu. "_**Uh oh.**__ Time to leave! Run!" _Zetsu ran as fast as he could, occasionally hiding within the foliage to avoid the attacks, which had started to become chakra based. He continued running, and saw Itachi waiting impatiently at the front of the shop, a pair of dango sticks in his hand.

He raised an eyebrow as Zetsu hurtled out of the dense brush, past him, and down the road. "Itachi! RUN!: He said loudly as he passed. Itachi looked confused, until he saw the 5 ninja which were apparently pursuing him. "_What the heck? I wonder what he did now…"_ He thought. Itachi threw the sticks on the ground and ran after Zetsu, catching up with him fairly easily. He gave Zetsu a questioning look; Zetsu sighed and told him of his small error. _"Unbelievable…" _

"**They're coming nearer**." Zetsu and Itachi turned back, and saw that their pursuers were gaining ground on them; their attacks cutting through the trees and becoming more accurate the closer they got. "Why don't we just fight them and finish them off? Or are we going to let them come to Konoha with us?" Itachi asked in a sarcastic manner.

Zetsu stopped, and turned to face their opponents, while Itachi did the same. The Jounins stopped a safe distance away as well, feeling slightly tense in anticipation.

"We have important business to attend to, so if you value your life, I suggest you let us pass." Itachi said quietly. The Jounins refused his suggestion, and readied themselves.

Itachi noticed their shift in stance, and sighed. "So be it."

Five minutes later, the unconscious bodies of the 5 ninjas were thrown unceremoniously behind some bushes. "**For Jounins, those guys were pretty weak.** Yeah. I wonder what village they came from?" Zetsu asked curiously.

Itachi shrugged, not really caring at the moment. "If they were from Konoha though, that would just be sad."

With that, the two continued once again, though Itachi kept an eye on Zetsu to make sure that he didn't pull a similar stunt at the other stops they went to.

………………………………...

"_I like to be left alone, but seriously, this amount of quiet is just unnerving. At least Zetsu has himself to talk to…" _Itachi thought a while later. This prompted Itachi to do something he had rarely done before: start a conversation.

"So, Zetsu…um…what's it like to not have to work with a partner? I mean, since you're the only one without one…" Itachi scrambled for a topic, and mentally winced as he replayed what he had said, realizing how random it must have sounded.

Zetsu looked strangely at Itachi. It was rare for him to say more than a few syllables at a time, let alone willingly start a conversation with someone. "Well, it doesn't really seem like I don't have a partner, you know, since I work with my other half. **Damn straight!**" He agreed with himself. "Although if Pein does partner me with someone, its always Tobi, so I tend to be the one who keeps him on track and focused on the mission, because…well, you know how he can be." Zetsu half-smiled, and Itachi nodded. Yeah, he did know how Tobi could be. "You're probably the only one that Tobi will listen to, apart from Pein. That's probably why he patrners him with you. I highly doubt the rest of us could put up with him as well as you." Itachi complemented.

"_Wow, first a conversation-starter, then a compliment? That's highly irregular for Itachi. __**There must be something wrong with that boy.**__ You're so mean. Just because he's acting differently doesn't mean that he has problems. __**Are you sure one of those previous Jounins didn't transform himself into Itachi?**__ Ha ha. Well, at least he's nicer to talk to.__** Ouch.**__...Sorry."_ After this internal conversation, Zetsu and Itachi began opening up to each other, and talked amiably to each other on just about any topic.

"_He's actually not that bad of a guy._" Itachi and Zetsu both thought. Who knew that this mission could actually help them get to know each other better?

Before they knew it, the were at the main gates of Konoha, heavily disguised. Itachi had been previously a part of the village, so he was familiar of the layout, and directed Zetsu through the streets to a place where they could decide how they would carry out their mission without any unwelcome ears listening in.

"Wait. When we find our team, what's the point of the mission again?" Zetsu asked.

"Gather information, apparently." Itachi responded. "Although what information we need to find out, I have no clue."

"Ok then…I guess we'll just decide what to do as the events occur…not much to plan if we don't even know what we're supposed to be doing exactly."

Itachi nodded, and they both returned to the main street to find their team. But first, the dango store!

………………………………...

Sorry about the long wait for this chapter…hehe, well it looks like Tobi's mission is good for something at least. All the teams are learning a little more about each other, and finding out that maybe their not too bad? Well, next chapter will finish the pre-mission travelling and features Sasori and Kakuzu. Reviews and comments are always welcome!

-crimsonrose88


End file.
